Non-Sequiturs: 08.14.15

* Personal assistant claims Stan Lee less Mr. Fantastic, more Dr. Doom. Jesus, this kid wouldn't last five minutes in Biglaw. [Courthouse News Service] * Hot buns make customer very cross. [Lowering the Bar] * Future generations are suing Obama over climate change. In Oregon. Of course it's in Oregon. [MSNBC] * Judge sets murder defendant free citing double jeopardy after first judge declares a mistrial. [Baltimore Suns] * Woman's terrorist conviction disbarment-worthy. That sounds open-and-shut, but it's a lot more confusing than that sentence makes it appear. [Legal Profession Blog] * And congratulations to Elie! Yesterday (or maybe early, early this morning), he welcomed little Max. https://twitter.com/ElieNYC/status/632249277587324928